Isolation Observation: I’ve Never Been Hornier

Editor’s note for this series: Times are weird right now. Confusion. Anxiety. Panic. It’s been a rollercoaster of emotions these past few days. There’s a lot to observe when we’ve been forced to take a long collective pause. For our writers, they are working on their classic vulnerable OOM stories, and they are also bringing the funny, the reflective, and the weird bits we’ve all been experiencing during isolation. This new series, “Isolation Observation,” is meant to bring you into the very real worlds of our writers. Some go deep, some very light, and some in between. We’re all here in this together. xo Alex  


Yesterday, my husband and I had sex before our daily 8 a.m. walk, and by 11 a.m., I was already having thoughts about round two. As I was sitting in my office, listening to him yammer away on sales calls in his office next to mine, I had vivid thoughts about knocking down his door, completely naked, tossing his phone to the side, and pleading with him to cum inside of me again. (Mom + mother-in-law, remember when I told you not to read any of my articles? I warned you. You have no one to blame but yourself.)

Amidst a pandemic, global chaos, and financial uncertainty, I’ve never been hornier. For reference, last month, my husband and I barely had sex, predominately because I was never in the mood. I had an awful period, lots of travel, and overall just felt really shit about myself. Sex was the last thing on my mind. Ironically, it took the world to come to a halt for me to be consumed even just by the idea of sex.

Besides the pulsing desire for physical lust, my brain hasn’t been this sexually active in a long time. I’ve been imagining sexual scenarios, fantasizing about having outdoor sex, visualizing my orgasms, and polishing up my dirty talk lines. Even when I’m not having sex, my brain is dreaming up my next orgasm.

I’m at a loss for words to try and understand why my body (and mind) possibly chose this time to be so goddamn aroused. While most people are consumed with thoughts about our collective  unknown future, I’ve entered into a weird sexual twilight zone. I’m not kidding, the sound of birds singing could get me off right now.

When I turned to Google to find answers, I read an article highlighting a study on middle-aged women that indicated that “positive physical contact” helped reduce stress, while emotional support alone didn’t have the same impact. While that doesn’t necessarily explain why I’m so horny, especially during the most illogical of times, it does comfort me knowing that maybe what we all collectively need is physical human touch, to reduce our stress and remind us that the world is going to be okay. That we are going to be okay. I mean, we have nothing else to do, right?

Even if you don’t have a partner to isolate yourself with, not to worry, there are plenty of reasons to masturbate as a stress reliever. 

As for my vivid sexual thoughts at 11 a.m. yesterday morning…. I walked over to my bedroom, dusted off my giant vibrator, and went to town in my bathroom. The world may be ending, but goddamnit, I’ll make sure to savor every bit of orgasm I can before it does. 

LET'S TALK: have you been horny during these strange times?



  1. Definitely relate. I think it’s because I’ve slowed down and I’m not so busy and I’m more in tune with my body. Also, boredom.

  2. THIS! Omg I need it all day. I also feel this is the best time to try new things. My partner and I have really slowed things down. There’s no rush in our days anymore. We’ve been dating for almost 2 years and we don’t live together so day time sex almost never happened but now it’s like the clock strikes 2pm and I’m ready to go. Day time sex IS SO GOOD.

    1. DAY TIME SEX IS THE BEST! Pre-quarentine days my husband and I would try and have sex BEFORE date night because no one wants to have sex when your jeans are already undone AT THE RESTAURANT because you just ordered another pizza.

  3. Could not relate more. I work nights as a nurse so the times when each of us are ready are WACK but making it work. And all these amazing sex toy sites having huge sales. UGH

  4. With two kiddos and a husband who travels nearly every week during normal times we have definitely upped our game over the last couple of weeks. We are in the middle of a home remodel, moving into an unfinished home this weekend, and having kids home non-stop. Amidst it all we have found plenty of time to lock the door quite often!

  5. To me it makes sense. We are in a state of survival and our animal instincts are kicking in. Sex and physical contact is a chance to get out of our heads and into our bodies. We want to feel alive and in our power again – positive sexual contact literally giving us life!

  6. i traded beer for batteries from my best friend, i also broke the button on my vibrator. i’ve always been a sexual person but really only within a relationship. i’m as single as it gets and i have never wanted sex more than now. it’s so weird. maybe it’s because it’s the only high i can get and not need drugs or alcohol? maybe it’s because i can’t just get it if i want it. not sure but it’s been out of control.

    1. Saying it’s been OUT OF CONTROL is exactly how I would describe it for myself as well. I am in a relationship and STILL I can’t get enough. But I think you might be right.. maybe it’s the only high we’re able to get? A sort of soothing that’s needed during these times?

  7. I hear this, but on a different level. I’m single and literally can’t meet anyone new rn and can’t even call up that trusty hotty who conveniently moved like 5 mins from me…the frustration is REAL.

  8. I hear this, but on a different level. I’m single and literally can’t meet anyone new rn and can’t even call up that trusty hotty who conveniently moved like 5 mins from me…the frustration is REAL.

  9. I love this piece SO MUCH because it speaks volumes to our changing sexuality / sex drives. This sort of thing is so fluid and it’s so valid and normal for a person to crave touch and cum during times of stress. It’s also valid for a person NOT to crave those things during this time. The other day I was so stressed out about what all of this means—feeling lonely and scared and depressed and bad about my path and just having another human to connect with physically was a gateway into the present moment. (So is masturbation, in that I get to connect with the self.) Orgasms, similar time to working out, bring us back into our bodies!

  10. I am a sexual/sensual person in general whether alone or in a relationship. I feel like I am horny on the daily and usually multiple times a day. Normally this doesn’t bother me but my partner is in an anxious frenzy about the pandemic and because I am still working (no contact with outside people but we are working with a very small crew of people for to go orders) they have been really upset about me possibly getting it and infecting them which mean a strict no touching policy. No cuddles, kisses, hugs, physical comfort of ANY KIND. They sleep and sit on the couch and I am condemned to the reclining rocker and sleep alone at night. I’m starting to wonder if anyone else is experiencing the same thing. Our relationship is probably the best one we both have ever had with so many ups in the past 3 years we’ve been together and so few downs.

    1. Just got off the phone with a friend of mine who is going through exactly this. REALLY challenging when two parties process these types of events entirely differently. Wanted to share this so you know you are NOT alone. I know there are many couples struggling with this. One wanting connection, both emotionally and physically, and the other shuts down.

  11. I’m actually the opposite. I’ve been so unbelievably anxious about money, my family’s health etc I haven’t had sex once in weeks despite spending 24/7 with my partner. Not that you can’t be stressed and horny at the same time! That’s just my experience. I’m actually a bit jealous.